2020: Good Riddance

It’s New Year’s Eve. And instead of attending a party with friends I am, like so many of you, sat at home. And in my case, writing my first blog entry in nearly two years (the last one was in April 2019, for crying out loud).

The studio is cold and quiet, and will stay that way until the current Tier 4 restrictions get lifted. Bookings this year have been scant — that’s okay, I’ve had other ways to keep busy and keep the lights on — and the time and energy needed to do more creative and conceptual work have been scanter still.

And as we celebrate this arbitrary line in the sand, this throwing-in-the-bin of the year just gone, coupled with unreasonable hope for what begins tomorrow, I don’t know when I’m going to be picking up a camera again, at least not professionally.

Maybe when I do it’ll be more headshots, Maybe it’ll be something more “arty” (whatever that means). Maybe, maybe, maybe…

Here’s hoping your 2021 is better than your 2020 was, whatever that means.

In which one gets older, and changes direction twice

I'm now into my 39th trip around the sun. A bit balder, a bit greyer at the temples and in the beard (I'm starting to look as though I've eaten a badger and left the tail hanging out). A bit wiser? Maybe. One thing that I've definitely noticed over the last couple of years is that I'm less willing to tolerate having my time wasted (though I’m still perfectly happy to waste it myself).

At the start of the year I was embarking on a new endeavour: an MA in Photography with Falmouth University. I thought that it would help me find direction that I felt I’d lost, and maybe give me some of the drive to finish things that I’ve often struggled with.

Truth was, though, that the course wasn’t a good fit, and just last week I withdrew as a student. For one thing, it didn’t fit my learning style. I last studied for a postgraduate qualification back in 2002-3, and that was a very intensive course — one week of 9-5 studying, a week off for self-directed work, then another week of studying. This was a much more relaxed course and, being distance learning, I felt really disconnected from it.

I’m not the person that I was twenty years ago, and having studied photography on my own time and dime so much over the last ten years I figured that this whole distance learning approach would work for me. Turns out that I still need that intensity, taking in a lot in a short space of time, in order to be able to learn and want to learn more.

So, I’m the shortest-term MA dropout in the history of ever, possibly. I’m happy enough with that.

So what's next? April's already here, kids, there's no time to wait around.

In short, personal work, personal work, personal work. I've got notebooks full of the stuff that needs to get realised. Some of it is vastly different from what I've attempted before, some of it is projects that need to be finished lest they languish forever on a hard-drive somewhere.

All of that in between the regular work: headshots, fashion portraits, and music promo.

It's 2019, I'm Graham, and I still have no idea where the hell I'm going. Welcome to the ride.

New Year, New Start, etc.

It's 2019. And lo, everyone was thankful that the mess of 2018 was over and done with^*.

I didn't make any resolutions this year. After nigh on 38 years, there's not many New Year's resolutions that I can think of that have either stood the test of time or been particularly helpful. Most of the good stuff we do in our lives is about the forming of habits and the following-through on the promises-to-self that we make in the wee hours. So it goes.

But it's a New Year, so it's a time to start thinking about where I've been^** and where I want to go in the next 12 months.

Where I've been

I didn't create much in 2018. And that's not to say I didn't shoot much. I shot quite a lot, and although it wasn't as prolific a year as some have been, I'm satisfied enough with it from a volume-of-work-done point of view. Actors' headshots shoots have become more common, and with a bit of marketing I can see the chance for some real growth there.

But I didn't really push the boat out, creatively. I didn't do any of the crazy big production shoots that I've done in years past. I didn't do much in the way of work on my current projects — although I shot quite a lot of frames for subject|object, I didn't do anything for Celtic Gods. I didn't start any new projects and, crucially, I didn't finish any of the old ones, either, despite my intentions at the outset of the year.

Where I'm going

I've got a number of new challenges and Things To Keep Me Occupied this year. A lot of them aren't for the pages of this blog, really, so I'll spare you those. Photographically speaking, however, here are some Things:

Refurbish and relaunch the studio

Okay, technically not just photography-related, but whatever. I've had my studio space for about two years now. In that time I've shot quite a bit of work in it, but I've never been really happy with it. It's cold, because it's in an old mill. It's dark because it has no windows. It's untidy because it's mine. Etcetera. Hitherto, it's not been the most welcoming place for clients, and I've often found myself apologising for it.

So, new year, new space. Except I'm not going to move — partly because I don't want to spend the extra money on rent and partly because right now I've got all the space I really need (if not all that I'd really want, but see point 1). Instead, I'm refurbishing the space that I have: new floor (laminate wood instead of painted concrete), new furniture (at the very least a couch upon which clients can chill rather than the old office chairs I've been using for the last while), new lights (some reasonable IKEA wall lights rather than the horrible fluorescent overheads which are currently in use).

I'm part way through the project right now; the floor is down at least, and I've put shelving in to house all my equipment so that it takes up less floor space. Already it feels new and exciting, and I like being in it more than I did.

Ideally I'd like it to be more than just a photo studio space. I already use it for musical jams with a group of friends. I hope I'll use it for more things still — there being other forms of visual art besides photography.

Shoot more conceptual stuff

This last year I've shot a lot of portraits. I like shooting portraits; it's my comfort zone. And like all comfort zones, sooner or later, it can get boring.

Once again I find myself with a notebook full of ideas for more concept-driven images with wildly different visual aesthetics. I'm finding myself inspired by Alexia Sinclair, Tim Walker, Gregory Crewdson, John Keatley and others. And I'm in a position where I need shoot the images in my head or get off the proverbial pot.

And here's the thing, as ever: the only thing that's holding me back is me, and how much energy I can bring to the creative process.

FINISH STUFF

I'm terrible at finishing stuff. Absolutely, demonstrably awful. This year, I'm going to finally finish subject|object, and at least get the ball rolling on an exhibition for it.

I've got more Celtic Gods shoots in my notebook than I can shake a stick at, and yet I've done nothing with that project for nearly two years now — and the stuff I shot two years ago once again languishes unfinished.

For subject|object I simply need to go somewhere other than Manchester for a few days and shoot there, because it'd difficult to get ethnic diversity I want in this town, believe it or not. London is a much likelier place to find the folk I want to work with for this last phase. They say the last 10% of the work costs 90% of the efford, and that's definitely what I'm feeling right now.

TL; DR

2019 has to be the year of shooting or getting off the pot for me.

End.

^* Except for those people who see January first as an arbitrary boundary, and believe that all of existence is in fact just one long rolling shitshow from one day to the next. To each their own.

^**Okay, technically this should have been done at the end of 2018. It's a few weeks' difference; I'll live.

Fifteen-minute Portraits: An Arty Christmas Gift

Okay, let’s get this out of the way: Yes, it’s November. Yes, it’s not actually Christmas yet. And if you get me started on the fact that the Manchester Christmas Markets are already being built then you’ll have to hand me a beer and let me rant for a few hours.

Doesn't mean I’m above marketing my services as a Christmas present, however. So, on to the meat of the message!

Fifteen-minute Portraits are back for a second year!

Last year I started a Fifteen-minute Portrait service, which was a roaring success. The basic premise (which I shamelessly nicked from Jeremy Cowart), is this:

Here's how it works: the sitter comes to my studio in Manchester, we have fifteen minutes to shoot and chat. We pick a few favourite frames together, then we're done. The selection of the final portrait is mine, and because I'm limiting the amount of retouching I'm doing, the sitter should have their image within 24 hours.

This year, I’m not just offering the option to book a session with me. I’m also offering gift vouchers. Want to buy your loved one something quirky and different? Buy them a Fifteen-minute Portrait voucher.

The vouchers are valid for up to a year, so let’s make something cool together!